Dear Verene…

…it must have been a shock for you. All those stupid Dutch people that do not understand what you mean. All you want is to stop this horrible praising of slavery. And now, to them, you are the embodiement of evil, a women that doesn’t know what the hell she is talking about. How can that be, you are working for the UN, so you must know what you’re talking about, right?

Well Verene, truth be told, you made some mistakes. I won’t tell on you, but you did. But they are honest mistakes. I mean, how can something from the great American continent not be better than something from Europe. But you pissed off a lot of people when you told them they could have Santa Clause. Didn’t you know, Verene, that Santa Claus is a direct derivate of Sinterklaas? Yes, he is. Sinterklaas was brought to the Americas by European immigrants. From that time on, the one horse turned into several reindeer, the Zwarte Pieten (oh, the horror) turned into Elves (and everybody knows that Elves do not exist right) and Sinterklaas became Santa Clause. And it’s Coca Cola that turned him into the loveable character we know today, so what’s not to like, right? Surely, they can celebrate Christmas as they would Sinterklaas? You do, so why can’t they?

And why should the VN not investigate this terrible tradition in the Netherlands. I mean, after all, there’s peace in Syria, women in the Middle-East are no longer oppressed, gay people in Russia can now live their lives as they see fit and the Taliban have renounced there violence. So, it’s time to hammer down on those terrible traditions that praise and condone slavery.

But Verene, in all honesty, shouldn’t you at least have visited the Netherlands? Of do some research on the tradition itself, maybe even be there when they celebrate it, just so that you have firsthand information on the matter? I mean, to say that PM Rutte should ban the tradition, even before the committee has started their investigation is, let’s be honest, not that smart. Now everybody thinks you’re a prejudiced bigot. And you so not that Verene.

I think I have the solution for you. So that you may redeem yourself in the eyes of the Dutch: maybe you can investigate the ‘Suikerfeest’ as well. Afterall, if you are diabetic, sugar is no fun at all. And what about the ‘Offerfeest’. Try talking to some sheep and see how they feel about that? And maybe even ‘jodekoeken’. I mean, we all know that there are not actually jews used to make those cookies, but then again, the Zwarte Piet of today is not really a slave, now is he?

Maybe Verene, you should just silently back out of this investigation, leave it for what it is and let the people of the Netherlands decide for themselves. Because really, don’t you have anything better to do, like making sure that there actually will be peace in Syria, that the women of the Middle-East are indeed not oppressed anymore and that gay people in Russia can indeed live there lives without having to fear for it. Maybe Verene, those are goals worthy of your efforts. But as always, you know best…


A friend